Day 100/100: The (Odd) Future

The project is technically complete. Over. Kaput. Clearly, it's only beginning over here. 

I have so many humans to talk to, so many horses to meet, so many perspectives to uncover, so many ideas to learn. Ahhh, it's exciting. Just so it's not overwhelming for me, I'd like to make a little list of questions to help me clarify and determine what I hope to accomplish. Stay with me here. There are two halves to my whole and one of them happens to be a overbearing, anxious organizer with an excessive, yet helpful affinity for list-making. 

1. Do I want to drop my amateur so I am able to legitimately instruct, coach, and train horses and humans?
2. In what ways would I like to work with horses and humans?
3. What sort of knowledge, attributes, and skills would I like to communicate and share?
4. How can I incorporate some form of meditation to promote self-awareness, personal growth, and inner peace? 
5. In what ways do I hope to help people heal and grow as horseman/humans? 
6. How can I make the whole experience meaningful for the human while also making it a positive experience for the horse? 
7. What will the one-on-one sessions look like? What activities will they include? 
8. Why is this work important to me? 

This is a good start. I'll come back with answers soon. 

Day 97/100: Letting Go & Giving In

Horses operate outside of the human notion of time and space. They can access pure consciousness because of it. Woof. 

We're so worried about wasting time, not getting enough done every day, yearning for some sort of meaning while we spend our days at a computer, behind a desk, in an office. We close our eyes and dream of a better reality, the one where we not only have our dream job, but we're impossibly happy doing it. 

The number of times that I've lost my mind thinking about all the things I "should" be doing, the drawings I should have made, the articles I should have written, the books I should have read... In my mind, that nasty bitch of a feeling -regret- already owns these toxic thoughts. 

The reality is... I shouldn't be doing anything. I am alive and here and blissfully aware of everything and nothing at the same. I am useless and perfect and kind and moody and I love it all. Every choice I have ever made and will ever make is fine because ultimately, it doesn't matter! Ahhh I find such comfort in that. 

I hate labels. But I'll give myself one: I am a nihilistic optimist. The concept of time can't touch this; I wholeheartedly reject any idea of what I "should" be doing; Living up to any sort of potential is complete bullshit. Now go do whatever the hell you want, you beautiful, stupid butterfly. 

Day 84/100: Animal Intuition

I recently talked with the brilliant, intuitive mind behind Animal Intuition, a business is all about healing and bodywork for horses and dogs. Her name is Jenny Gott and she specializes in Animal Communication, Reiki, Equine and Canine Massage Therapy, Acupressure, Aromatherapy, Raindrop Technique, and Nutritional Supplements. 

Ahhh, it's so interesting and magical! Growing up, her grandparents had a beautiful Arabian ranch south of Minneapolis where she spent her youth falling in love with the horse and nature. Her site reads, "She has been helping animals with alternative and holistic care options since 2005. In her teenage years she found that health and healing were to be part of her journey. Her background, along with her lifestyle choices, gave her the ambition to continue her education and training in holistic care for animals."

I can't wait to meet up with her, watch her work on a horse, and sit down for an honest interview. 

Day 78/100: Show Ring Skepticism

I have conflicting feelings about showing right now. I can't wrap my head around them. It's confusing and tricky and in some ways, I feel like I'm abandoning a really big part of who I am. But it's also freeing. I'm thinking about my horses in new, quieter, simpler ways. I'm looking at them and appreciating their "undesirable" traits, grooming them longer, working with them on the ground with patience and understanding. I'm learning a new way to be with the horse and until I feel completely exciting and chomping at the bit to get back in the show ring, I'm going to keep exploring this new, beautiful, meaningful zone. 

If you're down to clown in this special realm, let me know. There's always room. 

1. What do you love about showing horses?
2. Do you think competing has helped you as an individual? In what ways?
3. What is your favorite show ring memory?
4. Do you ever view your time in the show ring or simply being at a horse show as a break from reality? Explain!
5. Do you think that some of the training methods used on horses competing in your horse’s discipline are physically and mentally humane for the animal?
6. If no, how does that make you feel about your discipline as a whole division of competition?
7. Sometimes, I feel like show horses (especially on the Arabian halter side of things) are unapologetically commoditized. They are bought and sold and turned into objects of wealth—not appreciated for the wonderful, intuitive animals they are. Have you considered this perspective before? What is your opinion?
8. If you had the resources available to you, would you like to incorporate holistic horse care, natural horsemanship, and connecting with your horse on a more emotional level?
9. If yes, what about these alternative routes of horsemanship (in comparison to the competitive show world) are attractive to you?
10. Would you like to explore some of these different routes with your own horse? 

Day 74/100: Grace Answers

I've known dear Grace since I was tiny one riding at Performance Plus Arabians. She told me recently that her first memory of me and first time meeting me happened at PPA - we weren't more than 8 years old. Apparently, I was munching away on snacks in the lounge while my sweet mum got my horse ready. Sounds about right. 

A big gracias to Grace for her time on these! And once again, I look forward to seeing this duo together on the ground, talking with her about Sandy's idiosyncrasies, and what she finds in the saddle on an emotional or mental level. 

It's all very interesting. Enjoy Grace's perspective! 

1. When did you begin riding? I started riding in December 1996. My dad bought my mom an Arabian horse as a surprise for Christmas that year since he knew that she loved horses and had shown Arabians growing up. Little did he realize that this Christmas gift would turn into a lifelong passion. Here we are nearly 20 years later!
2. What do you think has kept you interested? There are many things I love about the horses but one of my favorite things is that it allows my mom and I to spend a lot of quality time together. Growing up, the barn that I trained at was nearly 5 hours away – we spent a lot of time on the road to go practice and I feel like she knows me the best out of anyone. I also love the friendships that I have developed – even though I don’t get to see my horse friends all of the time, they’re some of my favorite people.
3. How do you feel when you’re grooming a horse? Riding? Competing? I enjoy grooming a horse because I like getting to know them on the ground and developing a personal relationship with them. I think it’s important to establish a bond with your horse and not keep things so business-like. They’re an animal with thoughts and feelings, not a machine! Each horse I have owned has had his or her own quirky personality, which I find very endearing. Riding at home I usually feel very relaxed – I like simply practicing what I need to work on and just working through problems. One thing I needed to work on this winter with my horse Sandy was controlling our speed. There are many times at the barn where I just canter around the arena – in circles, stopping in the middle to go onto a different lead, etc. to the point where I felt like I feel like I am a reiner. Haha. As for showing, I try my best to feel confident. I think it’s so important to build your relationship with your horse at home to be in sync in the show ring. It is a great feeling to know that you feel good about what’s going on beneath you regardless of the outcome in the class.
4. Do you like riding at home or competing best? What are the main differences in your temperament, goals, and general contentment in these two areas? That’s a tough one! When I am feeling confident and prepared I think there’s nothing more exciting than trotting through an in-gate with their head locked in the bridle and ears up. At a show, I feel more amped up and take things very seriously since I want my time there be worth it. At home, I just enjoy hanging out with everyone and getting that special one on one time with my trainer and horse.
5. Who is the horse in your life (past or present) that you have had the most special bond with? That’s a tie between two! The first one would be a horse from my childhood, Jon Bonjovi (Levi) and the other one is one that we had more recently, Pioneer Patriot.
6. Why is he the best? Levi is just so honest – he taught me so much about riding saddeseat and showing in general. I never met a horse who loved to show as much he did. He is still with us today at 27 and occasionally teaches the smallest of riders a thing or two. Patriot had such a good and willing attitude – I knew that he would never try to pull anything on me. He came into my life after having a very naughty horse that really shook up my confidence. He made me feel self-assured and took me on to win my first reserve national and national championships.
7. How did/do you feel when you’re with him/her? When I was with Levi, I felt like I was with my best friend. We bought him when I was 11 years old, so needless to say I was the super cheesy young preteen girl that LOVED her horse. Haha. With Patriot I also felt like I was with one of my best friends but I hopefully wasn’t as over the top about it as I was when I was younger. 
8. What are your strongest personal qualities as a horsewoman? I think one of my strengths is that I am a quiet rider. I don’t pick at my horses and tend to have soft hands. I also respect the horses and realize that they’re an animal who will have their off days, just like we as humans do.
9. What do you think you need to work on as a horsewoman? One thing I think I could definitely work on is my equitation. When I am riding I am so focused on the performance of the horse that I focus less on myself. I think I could benefit from having some instruction that focuses on telling me to sit up straighter and put my chin in the air. I think that this definitely creates a prettier presentation.
10. Do these strengths/weaknesses transfer into your real life in any way? I think that I could definitely work on being more confident and assertive in real life. As a young, twenty something I often feel like I am still trying to find my way and feel like my general life plan is still up in the air.
11. What are the qualities you see in the horse that you would like to embody yourself? The quality of a horse that I would like to embody most in real life is being a free spirit. I sometimes find myself being so worried about what my future plan is and where I am going next in my life that I need to relax and trust that things will work out how they’re supposed to and enjoy the ride a little more. (See what I did there?)

Day 69/100: Where to, M'lady?

I'm sitting on a few horse stories. Not literally! Woof. 
 

I have yet to find a publication where I feel they belong. Should I just make a new one? That seems like the best solution, yeah? 

I want something fresh and adventurous and honest - a collection of stories and photographs that have nothing to do with the trite, tired, pompous equine topics. This sort of publication has to exist! Right?? And if it doesn't, then damnit, I'll make it. 
If you make art and also like horses, let's chat.